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Work 4 Peace,Hold All Life Sacred,Eliminate Violence! I am on my mobile version of the door-to-door, going town-to-town holding readings/gatherings/discussions of my book "But What Can I Do?" This is my often neglected blog mostly about my travels since 9/11 as I engage in dialogue and actions. It is steaming with my opinions, insights, analyses toward that end of holding all life sacred, dismantling the empire and eliminating violence while creating the society we want ALL to thrive in

Monday, November 08, 2004

to leave the country or not to leave

today i begin my trip home to california. i've been gone for soooooo long, even when i returned it was only for brief moments. i've been keeping my homesickness at bay but now it has overwhelmed me. i can get biodiesel in atlanta, another cellphone (i lost my cell phone when i left tallahassee!), have breakfast with my wonderful daughter who has taken such excellent care of me this weekend, and hit the road.
i begin my day thinking about all the times i've considered leaving this country. i am 54 years old and i've been voting since 1968, the year nixon got into office. it was my first time ever voting - i couldn't wait. martin luther king had been assassination the previous year, the civil rights movement was in full gear, we were marching, rioting, demonstrating, sitting-in, boycotting - we were powerful and young and just knew we were changing our country & our world - all for the better. we had already made soooooo many, many changes, at our highschools, our neighborhoods, our towns - it seemed again we could never lose. bobbie kennedy was running for president - no way could we lose.
then kennedy was murdered, & nixon was in - big surprise. then watergate happened and still republicans remained in power, at least in the oval office.
but this is not about the extent to which the republicans are willing to go to in order to win - we already know they are willing to use bombs to get what they want - even bombs that leave depleted uranium all over our world....
this is about leaving the country. 1968, the first time - i couldn't believe nixon got elected. then again in 1972 when he got re-elected. then when reagan 'defeated' jimmy carter, jimmy fuckin' carter - probably one of the most compassionate presidents we've had in my lifetime - and then got re-elected again - not to mention the bush fiascos - all these times i seriously wanted to leave this country. i didn't.
do i leave this time? have the majority of the u.s. american people proved over and over and over again they are greedy bullies who believe might makes right, we deserve to consume 60% of the worlds' resources because we are so special, god blesses us, we have manifest destiny. this has to be hell, this life we live, where human beings, mostly white, rich, male, christian, will go to any extent to be on top of everyone else. and the other human beings, who live under such oppression, think emulating the oppressor will get them out from under and onto the top. how many of us think the top is not worthy of our energy and focus? not many. even those of us that are against war, against destroying people and the environment to get what we want, even those of us still participate in this society, benefit from this society, keep the fibers in place altho we're trying to change the pattern.
until the day comes that every human being, or the vast majority of human beings, agree to truly honor and protect all forms of life, we are in hell, we have made hell here on this wonderous earth.
do i stay and fight in this country that is truly destroying our whole world faster than anything - can i turn my back and walk away? i remember reading one time, another time i considered leaving, an article where the author said it was okay to leave the society when that society was so adverse to one's values & beliefs, it was okay to build your own society.
just considering going to another country is so u.s. american - how many countries in the world can the average u.s. american go to? almost any. we have such privilege. altho i've never been off this continent, i understand that most white americans chose to live segregated among themselves in other lands. i do not want this.
i am rambling. i have to get on the road, get back to california, get back to codepink & our regrouping.
peace & love, suzanne

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