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Work 4 Peace,Hold All Life Sacred,Eliminate Violence! I am on my mobile version of the door-to-door, going town-to-town holding readings/gatherings/discussions of my book "But What Can I Do?" This is my often neglected blog mostly about my travels since 9/11 as I engage in dialogue and actions. It is froth with my opinions, insights, analyses toward that end of holding all life sacred, dismantling the empire and eliminating violence while creating the society we want all to thrive in

Thursday, October 25, 2018

Newsletter #2: The myth of the military being an ‘escape’ out of poverty for poor people!

 I’ve been on the road since the end of March on what I’m calling my mobile version of the door-to-door but instead going town-to-town seeking out venues and individuals interested in and willing to host a book reading/gathering/discussion of my book “But What Can I Do?” and my life’s work and learnings.

It has been very challenging in some ways, very rewarding in many others. From every encounter, every reading, every dialogue, I learn things: especially the things I need to improve on.

Recently, I was reading with a group of mostly Jewish womxxn mostly white skinned who were part of an anti-racism committee so I had high expectations for a warm welcome and assumed I would be gathering with “the choir” – which I’m sure I was, but not to the extent I was fantasizing.

First I was given pause when we went around the circle introducing ourselves and only one or two could give an account of when they’d recently witnessed racism, and when they stood up to challenge it or wished they would have stood up to challenge it.

Racism happens in our country every single moment of every single day. And white womxxn NEED to, HAVE to, MUST be able to see, identify, and confront racism – to be a committed and active anti-racist.

My first mistake was to allow this lack of witness of and action against racism to stand unchallenged or even acknowledged by me. My shock as I listened was quickly replaced by my deep desire to proceed with the reading so I could complete my mission to dissect and obliterate racism through the knowledge written in my book.

If you’ve been to one of my readings (or if you’ve read my book) you will know that I begin by stating the fact that our country was begun, founded upon, and continues with racism, war, and misogyny throughout every single institution, organization, neighborhood, system in our country and I deeply thank Black and brown womxxn for teaching me almost everything I know today.

I continue with talking about how there are two things (at least) impeding real change in our country: one is that most of us (especially white people) do NOT know our true history; and two is that we know a lot of myths, lies, propaganda about who we are and our history.

I try to identify both our true history and the myths and lies surrounding what we think is our country. When we were discussing the myth of the military, a womon stated quite authoritatively to many nods and much agreement around the circle, that at least the military enabled poor people to escape poverty.

Poor people to escape poverty. This is such a deeply engrained myth, even liberals cannot see the horrific fallacy of this lie.

Frankly, I was deeply disturbed that this kind of excuse was being flaunted in this space during my reading. 10 years ago, I would have been more ready to address this bullshit. I protested loudly “how can we even consider that turning our youth into killers is a way out of poverty?” Most agreed with me that it was an egregious ‘choice’ and of course poor people should have better choices but they don’t, so at least they have that one.

Some even went on to say as long as that was a ‘viable’ and almost the only choice, they were going to extend that choice to the poor people they worked with.

Can anyone hear what the fuck these basically wealthy white Jewish womxxn were saying? Actually it’s a lie that many people hold sacred. Those of us that are so secure in our wealth and whiteness we know that our children are not in danger of being turned into killers first of all.

Then we can give ourselves a blank check of liberalness affirming the belief that the military is a ladder for some poor people. We can even bend over and extend the ladder, placing the top rungs firmly into the military and out of our view.

Then we can continue consuming all the riches our military provides for us as they invade or have invaded almost every country in the world, genociding and robbing those lands and peoples of their resources and then continuing to force those peoples and lands to bend to the will of our corporations brutally enforced by our military might.

But we can justify the genocide in our name by allowing that some poor people in this country are lifted out of poverty through the military.

Are you fuckin kidding me? So we turn young men into killers, arm them with weapons and the knowledge how to demolish human life, set them loose with mobs of their peers while directing them to conquer and murder womxxn, children, and men.

And then glibly claim this is an ‘escape’ from poverty?

I tried to site one of the many studies I read that has compared peer groups by race, economic status, education, sex and consistently, those who join the military are much less successful than their peers who have not joined the military.

I should have (and would have 10 years ago) mentioned the 25% of homeless people who are veterans; the 25 young men along with womxxn veterans of these current wars who are killing themselves EVERY DAY after they return from their ‘escape from poverty’; the fact that these veterans are over 2.5 times MORE likely to murder their wives or girlfriends than their peers who have not ‘escaped poverty’.

Nor did I address the myth of the escape from gangs and drugs the military offers to poor people. Are you fuckin kidding me? What bigger, more destructive, malicious, violent gang is there on our planet than the u.s.ofa. military? It’s just a legal and condoned gang, a gang these white Jewish womxxn don’t have to read about or witness on tv or fear when they stumble into one of those poverty-stricken neighborhoods they perceive as over-run by ‘gangs’.

I ask you, how can those of us who have so many more choices in front of our families besides the military not be stridently against the recruitment and exploitation of our youth who have none or few of those choices? How can we not do everything in our power to ensure their escape from the military at the very least?

How can we justify the continued monetary support in the very least of our military through our taxes? We choose to not only condemn poor people to a life that destroys their humanity but actually pay for the institution that is responsible for destroying them. All because we are more attached to the amerikkkan nitemare than we are to the sacredness of all life on Mother Earth. We care more about ensuring the amerikkkan nitemare is surviving and flourishing than we do about ensuring life is surviving and flourishing on Mother Earth.

For instance, we continue pumping gas into our engines so we can keep up our amerikkkan nitemare; we continue buying plastic and pesticides and chemicals so we can have easy, convenient access to stuff that makes us valued in our amerikkkan nitemare.

And we continue “thanking” those who have become killers for their “service” to us and our country.

There’s a loop in almost every major airport in our country that perpetuates the myth that these young men and womxxn whose lives are destroyed and exploited in the name of u.s.ofa. corporate domination are ‘serving’ our country. The truth that they are serving our corporations is not heard or spouted by even the most ‘liberal’ mayor.

We MUST challenge these lies and myths perpetuating war and our general acceptance of war as a valid way to get what we want, and exploiting those desperate or trained to be violent to kill for us. And before we protest too loudly, when we know our history, we know that we’ve been at war against someone EVERY SINGLE YEAR of our existence except for 17. Yes, seventeen.

Tuesday, October 23, 2018

Ozark Food Co-op "a-political"??? RU FUCKIN KIDDING ME

This is the response I got from the Ozark Natural Food Co-op in Fayetteville when I requested use of their ‘community’ room to hold a reading/gathering/discussion of my book “But What Can I Do?”

My emails are in bold (I hope it comes thru) and Mike’s are in regular print

Mz. Xan Joi,

Thank you so much for reaching out to the coop for your event. Unfortunately, our coop is deeply committed to being an apolitical organization and choose to not host any events or post any notices that are political in nature.

Thanks again, and good luck on the rest of your tour.

Mike Anzalone
General Manager
Ozark Natural Foods
479 521 7558

People, Planet and Prosperity. (The Triple Bottom Line)

Wow! Thank u soooooo much 4 responding.

I'm not sure exactly what u mean by "political" or "non-political". I thght u were a "co-operative" which is certainly a "political" entity in a capitalist society. And I understood you strive 4 such things as "organic", "locally grown", "making connections between where & how food is grown, nutrition & health" - again ALL "political" acts.

I know ur busy but I really want 2 understand what u mean by "political". My book, experiences, wisdom revolves around war, racism, misogyny. Ru saying u & ur members r not interested in dissecting these topics, that this kind of dialogue cannot exist under ur roof?

Again, thank u so much!

In solidarity & act, Xan


I do understand the perception that food coops are political organizations. There are many coops across the country who choose to be very outward in their political leanings. And that’s okay. Coops are designed to meet the needs of their ownership. At our coop though, we are not. We stay away from political, cultural and religious topics and concentrate all of our energy and resources on food and farmers.

You might want to try our public library. They host events of a variety of topics. We also have several family owned coffee shops who might be inclined to host your event. The Fayetteville Farmer’s Market might also be interested (although I am not sure how much longer their season lasts.) if you’ve never been to Fayetteville, we do have a main strip named Dickson Street that houses most of our bars and nightlife. You might find a partner there too.

Mike Anzalone
General Manager
Ozark Natural Foods
479 521 7558

People, Planet and Prosperity. (The Triple Bottom Line)

Mike - I'm 68 years old. ALL food co-ops r 'political' when food is an industry controlled by corporations 4 the profit of the most greedy, not 2 mention 6 billion tons of pesticides annually & gmo & terminator seeds. I was there when the 1st food co-ops were established both on the east & west coasts.

Food co-ops in & of themselves r "political". I'm wondering if ur members r aware that u consider their co-op a-political? When given a choice of corporate grocers or a co-op, isn't the decision based on one's politics?

What u really r saying is that ur co-op's 'politics' starts & ends there. Figuring out racism, misogyny, war in food delivery & access, in our local & global control of land distribution & purpose, let alone destroying Mother Earth 4 Monsanto/Bayer's profit is not a concern of ur co-op.

I'm deeply sorry this bubble exists around u. I urge u 2 re-think this individualistic heads-in-the-sand approach 2 the future of life on our planet, & allow the co-op 2 step up & do ur part in saving life on our planet.

Thank u 4 the leads. 


You have no idea what you are talking about and I am not going to be bullied by your accusations.

It’s time for you to move on. Please do not contact our coop again.

Mike Anzalone
General Manager
Ozark Natural Foods
479 521 7558

People, Planet and Prosperity. (The Triple Bottom Line)

No worries Mike. I've said what I need 2 say.

Thursday, October 18, 2018

Welder, Solar, Designer and Builder!

So if your in/near Columbus, Ohio & need a FABULOUS welder, come to Columbus Idea Foundry & ask for Rachel! She's amazing, talented, & competent!!!

I needed the tray for my batteries extended because I'm buying bigger batteries than my previous ones. She had to grind off the end and then weld an additional 1.5" piece onto that end. It took her about 45 minutes between grinding and welding and getting various machines and tools down the ramp and outside to my truck.

Then moving a little north in Ohio, if you looking for solar, Terry has great batteries, panels, inverters & info. He replaced my old batteries & now my solar is up & running. He's not a tRump supporter nor is he exceedingly macho but he is white & racist - not the overt kkk aryan nazi type but 'just' the ignorant 'them vs us' superior type....grrrrr.

Of course, if you need a camper designed and built, Shazam from the SF Bay Area is the BEST!

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

Justice for Womxxn!!!

Join us at Five pm in the parking lot closest to Strathan Hall for a special appearance by Xan Joi and her awesome “green-powered” truck. She will talk about her book “But What Can I Do” before she heads out to her next speaking engagement. The six pm event is a rally against domestic abuse and violence. Hope you all can make it!

HOW can we continue to continue our lives as usual????

How can we know this - & all we know - & continue our daily lives as usual? 
When oh when will we care more about valuing & protecting sacred life then our fucked up pursuit of the fuckin amerikkkan nitemare?
THIS is what causes us grief: our refusal to pay attention to what is happenin in our country, in our name and then to choose not to ACT. 
It is NOT the injustices we witness that make us crazy but it IS the desperate clinging to a lifestyle shoved down our throats in the guise of the amerikkkan nitemare as we dedicate our lives to the continuation of that nitemare regardless of the pain, suffering, destruction, injustice it brings to other humans & Mother Earth. 
It is the "continuing our lives as usual" when it has become soooooo clear that our lives as usual are killing others. That is the source of our misery, our fucked-up search for meaning while we destroy meaning, our inability to be 'happy'.

Saturday, October 13, 2018

'accidental' exposure....

Yikes - in Bloomsburg PA where lesbians were refused bridal gowns as the hateful owners who love god so fiercely consider them "sinners"!!! I 'accidentally' parked my truck out front to study my maps!

Tuesday, October 09, 2018


So I re-did my highway response card (again) - the fuck u's were fumin to hard to clearly see the old one

Fuckin piss(ed)off white men

What the fuck is the matter with white men? They just won major domination & free pass for violence along with a blow to womxxn - & they're STILL fuckin pissed. I got sooooo many fuck you's 2day, white men calling ME names intended to diminish MY intelligence, driving recklessly with vehicles they must not realize are much smaller than mine, & in a half-empty parking lot, look who chose to reveal exactly how much smaller he is, parking next to me:

Sunday, September 16, 2018

Huntington W VA

I'm so thrilled to find a Y open today, Sunday - last night the Charleston Y closed at 6pm, even tho the internet said it's open until 10...grrrr. As I was trapped by the parade, I didn't get to the y until 5:50pm so another day, not working out.

This Huntington Y is huge with two pools, several womyn's locker rooms, steam room and sauna inside the womyn's locker room! And I get to exercise upstairs, in front of a bank of windows overlooking the parking lot, while keeping an eye on my truck. Several people take pics but no one leaves a note!

When I go to leave, a big solid white man with a bald head and large beard eases around my truck and starts talking at me before I get a chance to put my gym things away. He is quite upset about the white and male war and appears to be really wanting to express his response.

He tells me I look like I’m probably 50 like he is and so we understand each other. Hmmmm – I’m 68 for the record.

He claims he’s lived thru riots, that his parents were poor and they lived in the ghetto. Doing the math quickly – he’s 53 – I tell him that would make him three and four if he’s talking about the response to the murder of MLK, which he is.

He demands that I admit Black people can be as racist as white people, which of course I challenge. He gets so angry, he’s spitting and shouting, his bald head reddening so brightly I’m worried he’ll have a heart attack. He is here to work out, I assume, but he doesn’t appear to be that healthy, more fat than solid.

I tell him I’m not going to talk with him if he can’t stop yelling at me, interrupting every time I try to speak. He calms down, apologizes, then his eyes fill with tears, voice wavering, as he curses Black people that are drug dealers, going so far as to say ‘they’ all need to be killed.

I am alarmed by his threat as I try to talk steer him in the direction of drug corporations & his lack of anger toward them. He wants me to prove that oil companies are not the richest in the world, but he has calmed down a little.

So I decide to ask him who uses more illegal drugs in this country, white or Black people. He looks at me as if I asked him did the sun come up today. He is adamant it is Black people who are drug dealers, murderers, and destroying his beautiful town of Charleston.

When I tell him the same exact percentage of Blacks and whites use illegal drugs - 13% of both populations - BUT Black people are incarcerated at 70% and whites at 13%, he demands that I prove that too. I ask him if he wants to buy my book but he doesn’t because he’s a poor truck driver who hates to read.

I tell him I love to read and spend many hours every day of my 68 years reading, researching, uncovering facts from lies.

He is not happy but at least he’s not still shouting at me. I leave him with the challenge to take his eyes off Black people and to start looking at those white people at the top who are pulling the strings and go after them. 

Scary fella...

Saturday, September 15, 2018

Charleston West Virginia

I head strate to the library so I can catch up on emails, work on scheduling more readings, and let folks know I’ll probably be off the grid for a few days – I’m heading to a national forest to spend a few days respite and recharging.

The library closes while I’m still not done – I haven’t been able to write one blog entry, grrrr, & there’s soooooo much to write about.

When I leave the library to return to the street, I am unable to move my truck because that very street I'm parked on has suddenly been shut down for a parade. A parade!

There are tons of mostly white people standing on the sidewalk with lots of children in tow. I can’t get anyone to explain to me what kind of parade this is until I see the banner stretched wide across the entire street in front of a marching band.

It says something about the Navy and several of the band folks are in the white dress uniform. Strutting along behind the band are people dressed up in various lacy costumes mostly in all black. It’s quite a bizarre parade but I hasten to my truck to engage with people staring at the Spanish side mostly. And the death to racism side. 

I want to join the parade in my truck but I'm facing the wrong way.

Many folks don't talk to me but take pics before hurrying off to march with the parade.