Missed opportunity to engage in anti-racism...grrrrr

I've come to Lafayette, invited by a white acquaintance who was successful setting up one reading for me, even though she had wanted to organize several others but was unable to.

This evening, she offers her home for a monthly Lesbian potluck gathering (held over the past 25 years) to which maybe 12 white dykes show up. After everyone has eaten and before most of the womyn leave, I announce that I've written a book and ask if anyone is interested in talking with me about it.

About 8 or 9 womyn sit down with me and listen intently as I give my (shortened) spiel. No one leaves in the middle, all seem to be engaged enough to enter into a somewhat lengthy discussion which is cut short when my host states unequivocally "well, there's always been war." In the pause that follows her announcement, I say "no there hasn't always been war, but that is one of the myths we've swallowed to make war palatable." She's furious, I've interrupted her. I apologize and ask her, as do several other womyn, to explain what she meant, but she's done. Two of the three couples ask me if they can buy my book and the gathering breaks up.

I feel really good about their interest and glad that my host has invited these womyn and given me the opportunity to talk with them until I realize I allowed them to leave without pointing out the racism existing right inside this white group..

I feel gravely remiss in my commitment to anti-racism, so engrossed I am in trying to entice them to read and act, I do not challenge them about the whiteness of their social group.