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Work 4 Peace,Hold All Life Sacred,Eliminate Violence! I am on my mobile version of the door-to-door, going town-to-town holding readings/gatherings/discussions of my book "But What Can I Do?" This is my often neglected blog mostly about my travels since 9/11 as I engage in dialogue and actions. It is froth with my opinions, insights, analyses toward that end of holding all life sacred, dismantling the empire and eliminating violence while creating the society we want all to thrive in

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Husbands - to be continued

I have never heard so much about husbands as I've heard both getting ready for this trip, and now on the road.

My husband this, my husband that, oh let me ask my husband, my husband is so kind to allow me to do this work, oh my husband says...

One womon told me her husband didn't want her to make an appointment with her Congressperson for us; another told me her husband didn't want her face on the news; yet another womon told me, after inviting me to come to her home, that her husband wouldn't want anything political parked in front of their home.

Several women said their husbands wouldn't allow them to go to D.C., especially without them (and probably their kids in tow!) - although they would work on them & see!

Then there are the husbands who feel the need to tell their wives to tell me something: like the womon whose husband told her to tell me not to drive when and where I had decided to go; another womon told me her husband said it wasn't a good idea for me to speak to congressmen, that they'll come around on their own!

But meeting a womon in Louisianna - a wealthy, white, middle-aged beautiful womon who had a sweet humility to her quiet demeanor - really gave me pause. Actually her acquiescence to a man that wasn't even present was really disconcerting - to both myself and the other womon there.

I tend to take people seriously, at their word, so you can tell me anything & I'll believe it. I still cannot tell if she was presenting herself as a stereotype, or if maybe she is a battered womon.

One CodePINKer thinks I have little tolerance for such internalized sexism on the part of wimmin: what I have no tolerance for is sexism disguised as patronizing support or 'protection'.

I have been as much at the mercy of sexism as many wimmin - and I have only grown into a fierce womonist/feminist, and I push myself and all wimmin to be more, to be better, stronger, wiser - to be all we can be.

We are all at different stages on the same continuum - from being born into a culture and society of oppression to freeing ourselves, confronting sexism (and all the isms) both internalized and external, and self-actualizing who we are as individuals and as wimmin.


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