The lesson I wish I didn't have to teach

A young white man cantered across my truck’s parking space at the rest stop this morning, twisting his body in order to keep his tRump & Pence hoodie pointing at us. I of course had to ask him if he wants to shuffle by scowling or would he like to engage in a dialogue. I like to encourage the altright male to dialogue as I attempt to curb his usual preference of spouting his views and then leaving. Even though he says he just wanted to show me his shirt, he does stop and engage in a conversation.

I totally forgot about my coffee that I was reheating to a burnt crisp inside my camper – at least only the pot burnt and not my camper! This youngster seemed to either no better than to spout overtly racist shit or he was aware of Mujasi and censored his language.

He was in full speed denial mode: “tRump is blocking certain countries, not Muslims (but look at France and Germany and what refugees are doing there); tRump is cleaning up after what could have been taken care of eight years ago (if only that president would have been willing to use ALL our firepower); Hillary is worse than tRump’s sexual abuse because she stayed with her husband who raped eleven womyn; and it was Hillary who was conspiring with the Russians, not tRump (and this news will come to light later today).”

Of course I challenged him on this and more until the 30 year old confessed he didn’t really listen to the news often or read very much. He claimed he was anti-war but North Korea {which he guessed was the size of the entire east coast and which we sent our military to in the 70’s as in 1970! I was overtly incredulous – he didn’t know about our attack against Korea in 1950….grrrrrr… but no, not the 1970’s but the 1870’s I inform him and now he looks overtly incredulous} but North Korea has a crazy person in charge. Really?

He admits the worse thing about Hillary and the best thing about tRump is their stance on guns. Then in the same moment he apologetically claims he’s pro-life and pro-guns. I’m sure he expects me to get into a debate on abortion but he’s caught up short when I tell him he can’t be pro-life, that one erases the other. “Guns are made for one reason only, and that is to kill, to end life.” He of course grins broadly and spouts “Guns don’t kill, people do!” I dismiss that with a “how ridiculous, of course guns kill.” I refuse to get distracted as I admonish “If you REALLY want to be ‘pro-life’, you must get rid of your guns. If you don’t, then you’re merely anti-womyn’s rights: that you want the ‘right’ to end a human right whenever you decide you want to, but you want to deny womyn the right to decide to abort a fetus.”

When he claims tRump is merely deporting grown children who were brought here illegally, Mujasi, who had been silently dribbling the ball a few feet away from us, picks up the ball and moves determinedly closer and speaks very eloquently and well-informed about the Dreamers and so matter-of-factly about tRump’s hate. Michael, as we now know is his name, smiles broadly but comments on Jasi’s advanced soccer skills.

I urge him to overcome his emotional responses he’s been carefully taught and to spend his time doing the research if he doesn’t believe Mujasi and me.

After he leaves, Jasi asks me if I thought this pro-tRump guy was a ‘nice’ man. So this was another painful but necessary learning experience for my grandchild: he was confused after experiencing so many white male tRump supporters foaming at the mouth and here this one was ‘nice’. We talked about how anyone can learn how to be ‘nice’, can seem ‘nice’ but ‘nice’ doesn’t mean he wouldn’t shoot us in the back if he decides to. We talked about appreciating ‘nice’ but not being fooled by ‘nice’ and the necessity of looking deeper.

The lesson I wish I didn't have to teach: Just because he's learned how to be "nice" doesn't mean he won't shoot you in the back